Behavioural problems in children

Behavioural problems in children are not a recent phenomenon if the number of parenting guide books and manuals that have been published - and are in the pipeline - is any indication. However, of late, the kind of behavioural issues that are worrying parents have a lot to do with the technological advances that are changing the lifestyles of both adults and children. To add to the changing environment, change in family structure, principles and values, and parent's education too play a big role in how a growing child thinks and acts, says Eva Jajonie, clinical psychotherapist at the American Center for Psychiatry and Neurology. Honing social skills through video games With the virtual world of entertainment so tempting, it is becoming increasingly difficult for parents to wean children away from video games and hand-held gadgets. Two questions high on most parents' mind are: how much time should be allotted for this? Is there a relation between lack of social skills and these new technologies? For children who struggle with social skills, or lack the skills to play team sports, these games entertain and level the playing field, says Jajonie. "Computer games are emotionally ‘safe'; for instance, when a child makes a mistake while playing a video game, no one has to know. In addition, making mistakes also helps the player improve. By trial and error, he learns the specific action needed to advance the next time. "There is satisfaction in steadily improving and, ultimately, winning, with no chance of failing or being teased,'' adds Jajonie, who has over 20 years experience having worked as a clinical psychotherapist/children social worker for the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services, Oakwood Hospital Psychiatric Unit, among others. When to seek expert help Is it really necessary for children to have periodical visits to a psychologist just like they visit their physical health practitioner? "My professional recommendation is that when parents notice/suspect persistent negative acts and signs of abnormal behaviours, they need to visit a psychologist,'' says Jajonie, whose areas of specialisation include individual and group therapy with adults, couples, and families; individual therapy with adolescents; stress management; conflict resolution; and brief solution-focused therapy. She offers a few pointers for parents to keep in mind: The most integral and influential factor in a child's life is his/her parents. It is therefore, the duty of parents to be well-informed and aware of all emotions and changes their child is going through. Having the knowledge of what is happening in their child's life gives them the power of being prepared if the need arises. Complaining that your child is addicted to video games is not an excuse because as a parent you've total power to control internet access or stop buying games. It is very important that parents do a complete background check of the people that they employ at home. Don't leave your children under their complete care. It is also important that you know who your child is spending time with when he/she is outdoors. Sex education in children depends on cultural boundaries and how educated parents are in this regard. Speak to them on the issue as soon as you feel they are emotionally mature.